What are the qualities of a good friend?
Since we are talking about women friends throughout our entire website, I am going to assume that we are talking about the qualities of a woman's friendship that has some longevity. In other words, you have been friends for a while.
Here is my list of Good Friend Qualities:
3. The Priority of Time
4. Positive Fun
Dottie, Marnie and Elaine having FUN on a Dolphin Cruise
Qualities of a Good Friend #1 - COMMITMENT
The number one quality for a good friendship is COMMITMENT. You will never have a friendship that lasts for 30 or 40 years without devotion to each other. Yes, you need to "hang in there!" Even when you're angry over what your woman friend did? YES! Even if you have had your feelings hurt by someone you thought was a Best Friend Sister? YES!
Is it easy to do? NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!
Is anything truly worthy of your time EASY? NO! That's why Quality Number 2 must be:
Qualities of a Good Friend #2 - FORGIVENESS
FORGIVENESS. There will always be opportunity for women friends to pardon one another for a mistake that has happened. There will be offenses in a friendship, I can promise you that. You will be offensive at times, and your best woman friend will be offensive at times.
You know why?
Because we are all human, and that will never change. "I'm sorry" will become the two most important and most often used words in a friendship that lasts a long time. Please, don't be afraid to say it.
Qualities of a Good Friend #3 - THE PRIORITY OF TIME
3. Here is a quote from me, Elaine, and I do believe it is profound. Wow! It's not often in my entire life that I have ever said something profound, (after all, I'm blonde!) but here it is for you, my Something Sisters:
"Time is the great equalizer of us all."
Everyone on the entire planet has only 24 hours per day; as comparisons go, we are all equally "timed."
What does that have to do with the qualities of a good friend?
As busy as you are, you must MAKE TIME for your best friend. Make it a priority to spend time with your terrific women friends.
If the miles separate you, as in the case of Barb and me, we talk on the phone a lot, and I'm sure lots of you use Skype. That's great, too. One other fun thing that has worked well for us is -- funny cards! I once owned a Hallmark Shop, that's how it got started.
And it works well for us. Part of the fun is "The Hunt" to find the funnier card, or the cuter card, or more funnier cards! And lots of them. Plus, we do that with cocktail napkins. www.curlygirldesigns.com has funny cards AND napkins.
If you live close to each other, of course, spending quality friendship time together is easier.
But it all starts with mindset: is your best friend worth thinking about? YES!
Is it worth your precious time to grow your best woman friend into a Best Friend Sister - - YES! YES! YES!
Good friends can always have a great, fun time together, no matter what they are doing! Good friends never judge; they just love and laugh together.
Qualities of a Good Friend #4 - POSITIVE FUN
4. Here is what keeps a great friendship growing: POSITIVE FUN! Hmmm -- can you have negative fun? I think not.
Here is a definition of a friend with POSITIVITY from the book Strengths Finder 2.0 by Tom Rath:
"You are generous with praise, quick to smile, and always on the lookout for the positive in the situation. Some call you light-hearted. Others just wish that their glass were as full as yours seems to be. But either way, people want to be around you. Their world looks better around you because your enthusiasm is contagious. You seem to find a way to lighten their spirit. You inject drama into every project. You celebrate every achievement. You find ways to make everything more exciting and more vital. Some cynics may reject your energy, but you are rarely dragged down. Your Positivity won't allow it. Somehow you can't quite escape your conviction that it is good to be alive, that work can be fun, and that no matter what the setbacks, one must never lose one's sense of humor."
Guess What? I took the test to find my strengths from Tom Rath's book, and POSITIVITY is my Number One talent!
Barb also took the test and here is her Number One talent: EMPATHY. Here is the definition of a friend with EMPATHY:
"You can sense the emotions of those around you. You can feel what they are
feeling as though their feelings are your own. Intuitively, you are able to see the world through their eyes and share their perspective. You do not necessarily feel pity for each person's predicament -- this would be sympathy, not Empathy. You do not necessarily condone the choices each person makes, but you do understand. This instinctive ability to understand is powerful. You hear the unvoiced questions. You anticipate the need. Where others grapple for words, you seem to find the right words and the right tone. You help people find the right phrases to express their feeling -- to themselves as well as to others. You help them give voice to their emotional life. For all these reasons other people are drawn to you."
I strongly encourage you to get the Strengths Finder book and take the test. You will find out something great about yourself. www.strengthsfinder.com
So, stick with Barb and me and all the other Something Sisters of the world. I think we have great qualities of a good friend. You will have a fun time on this website, plus we will try our best to understand your needs and answer your questions.
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31 Day Devotional
This thirty-one-day devotional book is written for you and your Best Friends to be renewed in your friendship with Jesus. Each day provides a place for you to personalize this with your Best Friend's name. It is a unique and memorable friendship gift. It is also great to keep you close to God!
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New Book from Elaine
FAITH ABOUT FEELINGS
Knowing God better and trusting Him more will allow a new level of living above your everyday feelings. Feelings are always in flux. They change with the ebb and flow of our day, and often cause us to make decisions that are not in keeping with our faith in God. Living above our circumstances is a gift in which God allows our faith to triumph over times of confusion, grief, fear and spiritual weakness. This book provides life-victory through our faith!
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